If you expect your IT cousin/uncle/brother hosting the family immich/nextcloud to not be a trusted person in regards of bad actors your issue is not exclusive to selfhosting.
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That’s like saying a farmer will put cheese on a piece of cardboard for the mice to eat.
They might eat it yes, but that wasnt the reason for the whole interaction to start. The glue around the cheese was.
I’m glad that you see my point that “other people hosting your data” is not really a good idea.
If you expect your IT cousin/uncle/brother hosting the family immich/nextcloud to not be a trusted person in regards of bad actors your issue is not exclusive to selfhosting.