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Which one would you pick? Cockroach?
Probably a big data oriented NoSQL database like ScyllaDB. It provides eventual consistency with fast and efficient reads and writes, but high availability, which seems like a perfect fit for the case. CockroachDB favors consistency in place of availability which doesn’t seem to be really a priority for Lemmy instances. You would rather have some upvotes, posts and comments missing sometimes than not being able to load the rest of the data.